Wanted to reply to the comment on the last post: The intense, complete devotion to a spouse portrayed in A Severe Mercy definitely could be overwhelming. I suppose it wasn't to me since I was too busy thinking about the other themes in the book. (And thus, perhaps, looking at one tree instead of the forest.)

Towards the end of the book, Vanauken does acknowledge that such total devotion was spiritually perilous to himself and his wife. Looking back on his life with her, he realizes that at some point, in some way God would have had to come first, and he calls himself "pagan" for focusing so completely on his wife.

And on a more cheerful note, I found that phone this morning!